Where ya goin’, Duncan?

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You look so determined.

You look so determined.

Adam and I were talking and all the sudden Duncan trots toward and quickly past us.  Not like a gallop sprint somewhere or a slow saunter, but a determined and focused jog.  Was he coming to see Adam?  Or me?

No….he was just running kind of fast but not actually fast to his favorite chair spot where he promptly plopped down and stared at us.  He’s doing it right now, actually.  I am looking at him and not the keyboard while I try not to break his gaze.  …I just won.   Actually he gave me that cat slow blink and I just stared back like a jerk.

If only I were making this stuff up. But I’m so glad I’m not.

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This is the stuff my dreams are made of.

This is the stuff my dreams are made of.

Firstly, so sorry about no updates for the week.  We were on a bit of a vacation.  And it was awesome!  But that’s why I was busy.

Secondly, this story happened when we were on vacation.  We were sitting in the airport about to board when I see a lady carrying a case with something white in it.  I hope my hope of hopes that it was a cat and not a silly little dog, though either would have amused me.

As we get on the plane I start checking out where to sit (Southwest, you know) and I see not just a cat in a carrying case but a cat on a cat bed on a lady’s lap.

I almost peed myself.

I asked Adam before we got on the plane if we could sit next to the cat (no, I’m not making that up  for humor here)….but alas, there was only the middle seat empty so we couldn’t.  I totally should have ditched Adam for the cat (no offence, Adam!).

Unfortunately, my glance from a distance was the closest contact I had with the somewhat-ugly-smushed-face all white cat but at least I got a cattoon out of it.

I wish I had the time or cared enough to do my nails because my cousin has some really cool ideas to try!

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So I have been peepin’ on my cousin’s blog and she kicks butt for cool ideas and has what looks like incredibly patience and skills for detail.  Above is just one of the really cool things she posts.  So if you want cool ideas for painting your nails, check out her blog Mixed Mama!

Plus, here’s a picture of me if I decided to do my nails.  I would be proud and sassy.  It would not make me look like I have monster hands, which unfortunately this drawing kind of does, haha.

Purty

Purty

You know, it’s just a Shetland pony driving a car.

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Just cruisin'

Just cruisin'

So I totally apologize for not having drawings the last week but I seriously have not sat down on a couch since Tuesday.  We have been doing house stuff galore and I ended up taking a 4 hour nap today because of it.  Can a nap be that long?  Or does it have a new name once it’s been longer than like an hour?  If you have any ideas about the name, you let me know.  Otherwise I’ll just call it a long-nap.

Anyway, I really wanted to do a drawing today but have no juice to get my creativity going, so I asked Adam for help.  He told me I should draw a Shetland pony driving a car.  I kind of suck at driving cars so I had to crop it, haha.

So I might have a new hobby. And it’s kind of more like manual labor.

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I'm ready for you to make me smell less disgusting.

I'm ready for you to make me smell less disgusting.

It’s true.  We got a house!!!  It’s our first home and we’re excited…and a little poor.  And the new house is actually an old house that needs some fixing up.  Oh, and it smells like a nasty wet dog peed on itself and rolled all over the carpet for a year.  So we have to clean that up.

But, a little TLC comes with a price to pay, namely time.   So, please forgive me if in the coming weeks I am a little lax in my posting but I will putting my talent to good use fixing up a bungalow for us to live in.  I’m on my way to not being a basement troll anymore!!

Here is a sketch of our house getting excited that someone will love it again!  I think I’m going to think of a name for our house.   Do people do that?  I mean, I know people name them like “Sunset Manor” but I was thinking of a person name.  Like Edna.  More on that later.

Please call him Mr. Duncan now.

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Forget a regular collar!

Forget a regular collar!

I decided that instead of a regular collar Duncan should wear a tie everywhere.  And then he can be a business man (business cat?) since he’s already wearing a tie.  Or maybe a lawyer.  Whatever brings in more money is good for me.

Adam likes new wearing new accessories.

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It looks sooooo good on him.

It looks sooooo good on him.

So I have a horrible secret to reveal.  I cause my husband gratuitous injuries.  Not like in a secret abusive relationship way, but either directly or indirectly, I cause Adam injuries on a fairly regular basis.

For example, this weekend we decided to try cross-country skiing because the park system had a rental for boots and skis.  Sounded awesome.  So I got him to try it with me.  He hasn’t ever skied but decided to give it a shot.  Well, in seriously the first 2 minutes of having his skis, on he fell and twisted his already sensitive knees.  Like a trooper he kept going and did that again at least 5 more times.

THEN, the next day he was out taking the ice off my car.  And he poked himself in the eye with the ice scraper and we had to go to urgent care for 2 hours.

This was just this weekend.  I can’t even count how many times I’ve accidentally (yes, ACCIDENTALLY) poked him in the eye or hit him in some way.

So either he is a big ol’ wimp or I might be a sociopath.

Why are flat-faced cats so ugly they’re cute?

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Mrow

Mrow

So I’ve been drawing on paper while I wait for my stylus to arrive and I kind of like it more.  Except for the scanning.  I don’t know why but I seriously hate scanning stuff – for some reason it just irks me.

So anyway, I got a kitten daily calendar (go figure, right?) and there was a pair of goofy looking flat-faced cats that cracked me up.  So here they are.  🙂

I give you a video of a speed climber.

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Info first, video second…

Adam and I were looking at YouTube videos of speed climbers to see them their climbing superpowers.  Seriously, that’s ridiculously impressive.  So anyway, we click on this one….and I about died from laughring (laugh-crying).  Mostly the music made the whole thing.  And the intro text in the video. You might not find this hilarious, but I totally did.

A new year, and a malfunctioning drawing tablet, so you’re stuck with this “cattoon.”

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Just hanging out with the cats.

Just hanging out with the cats.

So my dumb ol’ drawing tablet stylus is still broken and I had to order one from Amazon.  Boo.  But at least I’ll soon be able to do better digital drawings than I did today with my mouse.

What is this, you ask? I’m sitting on the couch, making a dumb face, with the “cats” sitting behind me.  I had to add this whole description because Adam said…”Huh?  What is that?  Why are you making that dumb face?” when I showed him.

Thanks.

I just decided to do a stupid picture of myself and do something funny with it.  So there you have it.  Plus, I’m too lazy to do it in pen and then scan it.  I don’t know why that whole scanning process drives me nuts.

Drumroll please…………….TADA! Today is ONE FULL YEAR OF NOTACRAZYCATLADY!!!

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Sorry for all the caps up there but I AM EXCITED!  This marks the end of the first year of notacrazycatlady and also the conclusion of my post a day challenge.

For those of you from the beginning, you know that I have boldly accepted the challenge (from WordPress.com and I suppose myself) to post every day.  Now, being that I am a teacher and don’t always have free time on my hands (ok, that’s a huge lie) and have gone on some vacations and whatnot, this proved to be a bit difficult sometimes.  But I loved challenging myself and have made some great strides in my cattooning.

Poor Adam had to deal with me jolting out of bed at 11:30 more than once or sitting on my phone trying to get a phone cartoon done when we were out with friends when I forgot that I had a post to complete.  And despite all this, he surprised me today with THIS!!!

Anniversary Surprise

Yes, that is a two-pound resealable bag of Twizzlers

All his favorites!

All his favorites!

Yes, you saw correctly.  My man got me a bottle of champagne, a two-pound bag of Twizzlers, and a hand-crafted, hand-selected anniversary picture of his favorite notacrazycatlady cattoons.  This might be better than our real anniversary!

Now, don’t think this means that notacrazycatlady is kaput.  I will be posting at least 2 times a week, if not more.  I just don’t think the everyday thing will happen.  It was a great experience and I love creating something every day, but with the Etsy store and the fact that thinking about posting everyday sometimes made me cry (not really), I will be trying to test out a few more new adventures.  But keep on checking back, because I’ll be here!

As a bonus treat today, I will share with you a little something Adam and I did on our honeymoon.  This was pre-notacrazycatlady but post-me-starting-to-cattoon-a-lot.

meow

meow

We got matching Duncan and Smudge tattoos.  Yes.  Yes, we did.  And we call them cattoos.  Well, I don’t know if he does, but I do.

Now this kind of looks like it sucks.  And it was supposed to be a little “sketchy”…not like sketchy sketchy, but like a sketch.  It’s all mellowed out now and blended nicely.  This was literally the day after we got them.  Yes, Adam has the same cat tattoo on his ankle, too.  I’ll spare him the embarrassment and just use my leg instead, ha!

Thank you to all you not crazy cattoon loving fans, friends, and family and I look forward to sharing more cattoons and stories with you in the future and hearing you share your stories with me, too!

Man I love Jimmy Johns

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Yay!!!!

Yay!!!!

So I had a lovely time with my grammy today.  She lives like 10 minutes from work so I stopped by to hang out for a bit and we went out for a bite to eat.  I introduced her to Jimmy Johns and we both got my favorite…the Beach Club.  Turkey, provolone (I think), lettuce, sprouts (yum!), avocado spread (double yum!), and no mayo.  Soooooooo good.   My love affair with Jimmy Johns is on-again, off-again and began in college.  I know it’s not the best food around but dog-gone-it, I love those subs.  And the chips.  Mmmmm.  Gram loved it too.  And we love each other.  So it was a lovey day!

True story.

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Kazaam!

Kazaam!

Does anyone else have the problem where they believe their couches to have some sort of magical powers?  It’s like as soon as I sit near/on one with a moderate amount of relaxation, I’m immediately cast under its spell for a minimum of an hour, usually 3.  What the heck?

True story.

Hey weird little dog with four…um…three legs.

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Oh, hi.

Oh, hi.

So browsing Reddit, as usual, I come across this little dog named ChaCha (awesome…I love it) who has three legs.  The owner decided to outfit with another one.  Sort of….

But this pup was so cute that the creepiness of a misplaced baby arm just seemed to meld with the cuteness of the doggy and make it at least 1056% cuter.

Do you like shopping on Etsy? Check out my new shop!

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Check it out!

Just click the cattoon above to check it out!

So I’ve decided to open a store on Etsy!  Check it out!

Right now I have some baby onesies but I might be branching out to whatever floats my boat, so to speak.

Here’s a sample!

Animal trip onesie

Animal trip onesie

Monster onesie
Monster onesie
Dino onesie

Dino onesie

Photobomb!

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So I took this photo on our honeymoon in Maine and I decided…you know, since I’m not a crazy cat lady….that it would be fun to pretend the cats were there, too.  Since Smudge loves to get in the way of things he is photobombing a lovely shot of Duncan dipping his toes in the ocean.

It’s a cat in a basket!

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Yum!

Yum!

I really hope Jimmie Chew doesn’t get sick of me drawing pictures from his blog, but I just love them.  They crack me up.  Here is a basket chewing cat cattoon.

On another fun note, in just a few short days (10 maybe?  I can’t recall) I will have posted a blog post everyday for the last year.  Woo!  So even though it’s 2012, this is the finale to my postaday2011.

Thanks to everyone who follows along with me on my somewhat ridiculous cattooning adventures.

“He’s got that annoying bird look.” – my brother.

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SQWAAAAAK!

SQWAAAAAK!

You remember that crazy owl I cartooned from a crazy owl photo?  Here’s the painting version.  My friend made an innocuous comment on Facebook about how he would hang the cartoon up in his house….so I decided to just do it.  He’d better hang it up next to the crystal bear holding a heart we got them as a house warming gift.

JoJo versus the Helicopter

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To the death

To the death

My little brother and sister got remote controlled helicopters and they were a big hit for everyone to play with.  However, JoJo the dog also found them….intriguing.  I can’t really say how JoJo felt because he fervently began barking at it, following it, retreating from it, AND madly wagging his tail at it.  I can’t quite determine what his intentions were but it was funny all the same to watch him in his awkward small dog confusion.

It’s a party!

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Huzzah!

Huzzah!

This is a post live from a family holiday party!  I am a leaning cat because I am a bit tipsy, haha.  There are  a lot of family members here and I don’t want to eavesdrop on their conversations so that’s why I made them say “blah blah”…not that they just blah blah it up.  🙂

I saw the fattest squirrel today

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image

Ok, this totally sucks but I did it in 10 seconds on my phone because I’m at my aunt’s house and I fourier to do one earlier.  But I really saw the fattest squirrel ever today.  12
pounds easy.

image

There it is.  Sorry my phone couldn’t zoom fast enough.  Dang technology.

I will admit I am a grade-A pouter sometimes.

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harumph

harumph

So it’s late and I hadn’t done a cattoon yet and I made a silly one about sleeping in and then I went to put it in the blog post and it had somehow not been saved and this is the second or so time this has happened so I made a cartoon about pouting and this is a really long sentence.

I know you love a good ugly sweater contest.

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I know, I know.  Squirrels (to my knowledge) don't eat carrots.

I know, I know. Squirrels (to my knowledge) don't eat carrots.

That dog is a kleptomaniac.

That dog is a kleptomaniac.

At work we had an ugly sweater contest.  I decided to make my own.  Here is my recipe for a delightful ugly sweater, which was actually a sweatshirt.

  1. Get a plain ol’ sweatshirt (I got mine in the men’s section at Target for $7.50!).
  2. Use puffy paint to create goofy looking snowmen who are sad about losing their noses (yes, the squirrel took it – I didn’t think it was that unclear…) and their hats (that dumb dog!).  Have fun “jazzing” them up with mittens and the like.  Use puffy paint to avoid wasting the other good fabric paint you have.  Downside: puffy paint takes FOREVER to dry, especially if you make it nice and puffy.  Solution: smear around the puffy paint to make it less puffy and reduce drying time.
  3. Find sparkly acrylic gems and adhere them like abundant snowflakes using glitter puffy paint.  Be advised: puffy paint takes FOREVER to dry, so don’t try to do all parts at once, especially if you are working on two tv trays and don’t have an actual table to spread out on.  Also, don’t try to do the front and the back at the same time or you will have a glittery table.
  4. Use a super hot glue gun to adhere bits of ribbon to represent snow and delicate lace trim around the wrists, waist, and neck.  Tres chic.  Caution: super hot glue guns produce super hot glue.  This will burn you.  You might end up with 3 burn blisters on the tips of your finger.  Run them under cool water – the pain will go away in a day or so; maybe sooner if you are lucky.
  5. Continue using a super hot glue gun to adhere old leaves leftover from your wedding decorations.  Hide the ugly parts with jingle bells, also adhered using a super hot glue gun.  Paint the leaves with pearlescent white paint to simulate snow.  Add any fun decorations to the leaves/trees that you want.  Fun addition: try adding a crazy twig and bird combo to the shoulder.  You will have an instant device to attract new friends asking if the bird is real, as well as a great distancing tool to keep people away for fear of being stuck by a stick on your shoulder.
  6. Use that super hot glue gun again to put jingle bells down the seam of the arm. Why?  It seemed like a good spot that often goes neglected in most clothing and actually was found to bring immense joy to the wearer for accompanying music and making more emphatic points in discussion.
  7. Attach garland to the waist of the sweatshirt for a really nice finish.  Be aware that the metal in the middle of the garland doesn’t have a lot of give, so garland the front and back with separate garland bits.
  8. Enjoy your new ugly sweatshirt and share it with the world!!!

P.S. I won the “Pimp My Sweater” contest with this baby.  Huzzah!

My dreams are coming true.

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Finally!

Finally!

So I am in the middle of making an incredibly awesome holiday sweater, which should be ready for a post tomorrow I think, so here is a dumb drawing of a mini me getting super excited for this gum I tried today which totally tasted like apple pie.  My fantasy of living in Willy Wonka’s world is steadily getting closer and closer!

This is a typical family photo.

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Typical

Typical

So my Aunt Kathy was in town not too long ago and we took a family photo.  Unbeknownst to me, apparently it was a bunny-ear-required photo and I didn’t get the memo.  I can’t share the actual photo since I don’t have it (Aunt Kathy, if you’re reading this, send that thing my way!) so here is a cartoon about it.

Secondly, here is an actual photo of how we created the set-up for the camera to shoot.  It was set on an automatic timer but we had to figure out how to get it angled properly and to the right height.  No lie, we did not do this to be funny.  It took four adults to achieve this level of engineering.

Yes, that's a butter knifed down there.

Yes, that's a butter knife down there.

Ho. Ho. Ho.

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I'm heeeeere.

I'm heeeeere.

So I was showing students this neat online whiteboard website and they asked me to draw Santa.  So I did.  Comments included, “He’s creepy,” “It’s good but it’s not good” (maybe ’cause it’s creepy?), and “I like it.”  I guess that isn’t so bad.  Thanks, 7th graders; your 12- and 13-year old insights are invaluable and generally hilarious.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

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Maybe if they don't see how desperate I am...

Maybe if they don't see how desperate I am...

Yes, I’ll admit it.  Sometimes Adam and I make up songs about mundane everyday things.  Today Adam was singing about the cats.  Specifically Duncan.  Pretty much because Duncan was looking ridiculous and desperate but as if he was trying to hide it.  We decided that it was his way of getting food since he knows that being annoying and meowing just won’t work anymore.

me-sigh-ow.

Will their love of snacks bring them together?

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love of snacks = love of each other?

love of snacks = love of each other?

Adam’s parents’ cat does not really…um…fit in with our cats.  They are a bit brutish with him.  However, we had a breakthrough with the cats.  They were all amicably near each other within a foot when Adam and I gave them all snacks.  Could this be the beginning of a change around here?

My husband is cool.

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Flowers 'n' Chocolates

Flowers 'n' Chocolates

So today turned out pretty awesome.  Sorry for no cattoon but this was exciting.  I got to go to my bff Sarah’s community band concert (haha, I know.  I totally am joining soon so there’ll be funny cattoons on that topic coming up in the nearish future) and THEN I come home to this!  What a treat!  Adam is a cool dude.

Best part?  The friggin’ awesome rainbow wafers courtesy of Malley’s – a Cleveland local chocolate company that is super delish.  I am kind of obsessed with these wafers and talk about them a lot so Adam was kind enough to indulge my hunger for candy.

Worst part?  He told me he was going to get a few groceries and he didn’t really go get them.  But he DID at least get me my Frigo Cheese Heads string cheese sticks – the BEST by far of the string cheese cheeses.  I’ve done extensive research and taste testing…I know.  But totally jk about the whole “worst part” thing.  I’m no brat.  (Ok, I suppose I can be at times…)

Angry Appendix

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You will experience my 3.5" wrath.

You will experience my 3.5" wrath.

So this was an interesting weekend.   I got to go see the ballet The Nutcracker with Ken (yay!) because Lee was sick (boo!) and I went in his place.  So then we found out this morning that Lee was sick not because of a stomach-bug but because of a stomach fight.  His appendix was ready to go to blows with Lee.

Yes, it was an epic battle  that the appendix was winning until Lee bravely admitted himself to the ER and got an appendectomy.  Take that, appendix.

When he was out of surgery, the doctor came to us to tell us it went well and that the appendix was not ruptured, just angry.  So here’s in honor of your angry appendix, Lee.  Suck it, appendix.

Warning: this is not direct at you, just directed toward you (if you’re looking at your computer screen, which I would assume you are since you are reading this)

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Raspberry

Raspberry

Anyone know why it’s called a raspberry?  I suppose I could look it up but…..meh.

Thanks, Connie and Betsy!

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This is one enthusiastic wild boar.

This is one enthusiastic wild boar.

So I offered a mini-contest to whomever got the 100th fan of notacrazycatlady.com’s Facebook page.  Thanks to Connie and Betsy who made that happen!

Their prize?  THIS CARTOON!  Wooo!

Anyway, here’s what they had to say about this….

“Here is our 100th member picture choice! Kind of a crazy one, but this is my mom and I at an outdoors weekend a few years back. We made a new friend there. Ever drawn an enthusiastic wild boar before? :)… “Lady Hoggers”- on A&E Wednesday nights at 10:00—yeah, that’s us.”

I kiiiiiinda of can’t tell if they’re being serious and really are reality tv stars or they just do what those ladies do.  Either way I haven’t actually seen the show (which is why I don’t think I know this or not) BUT I have seen the previews and I’ll admit…I’m intrigued.

But thanks again to the fans!  Otherwise I would just be here drawing dumb pictures for just myself, and while that’s fun, it’s way more fun to share 🙂

Smudge really needs a manicure.

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Me-owch

Me-owch

The other day Smudge was climbing on me to get to some food on a tv tray – way to go Duncan teaching your brother dumb tricks and bad habits.  Adam tried to gently dissuade him with a wee shove but Smudge wasn’t ready to budge.  So he just casually pierced my fleshy quad with his razor sharp talon claws in an attempt to stay close to his beloved food bits.  So I had 14-ish pounds of cat hanging from my leg.  And now I literally have 10 little claws lines in my leg.  No joke.

You should all be glad I’m not a real detective.

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You're lying!.....maybe....

You're lying!.....maybe....

So I’m really into this video game, L.A. Noire.  If you don’t know about it, it’s a pretty revolutionary game where they did all this crazy technology stuff to get real actors to act the parts of the characters and therefore have remarkably life-like game people.  Because of this, you have to read the faces and body language of people to determine if they are telling the truth or not.

And I SUCK at it.  So I’m glad (and you should be, too) that I am not a real detective.

I also suck at the driving in the game too pretty much.  Sorry, can’t avoid that one in real life.

“Adam, I’m no wimp” or “A post based on childish response to taunting by a husband”

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I put the painting on his favorite chair.

I put the painting on his favorite chair.

Ok, I give in.  Mostly because Adam called me a wimp in my comments.  Boo hoo – now I’m crying but when I’m done I’m gonna show you and post that dumb painting! That’ll show you….

Here is the painitng of Mr. Smudge.  It’s on his favorite chair to add to the realism.  I know you might think I’m crazy for being all weird about it, but perhaps that’s just the ol’ perfectionist in me rearing her little big head.  And I guess in fairness/to toot my own horn (I’m not THAT critical of myself, yo) this is my 3rd attempt at something “realistic” and my first cat painting beyond a cattoon.

I decided not to post the photo with it, though because the angles are off a bit and that’s my beef with it.  And my prerogative not to share.  And I’m now Bobby Brown.  Minus the drugs, singing, and crazy relationships.  Wait, didn’t Britney do a cover of that song?  Same differences apply here, too, then I suppose.

This is a bit crazy even for me.

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That bird is crazy!  And I'm Brian Fellow!

That bird is crazy! And I'm Brian Fellow! (Just a li'l shoutout to a favorite SNL skit!)

So I found this crazy owl baby picture on Reddit and decided it tickled my fancy.   So I didn’t quite get it right, but I still think it’s pretty funny.  Adam says it’s a little too dark for my normal style but I like it.  I guess a crazy owl baby can spread its crazy even from a distance.

Beware.  Birds are creepy.